I wasn’t sure what to write on this subject to be honest. Strangely even though it is spelled differently, the first thing that came to mind is the perfume which my mother used to wear.
I remember her putting it on when she and my dad were having a date. So, in my mind, the word taboo got totally tied to Tabu and was positive.
We laughed at sexual innuendo. We talked about puberty and boys. We talked politics, both sides. We discussed abuse and alcoholism openly as they had touched our family. Healthy communication and open debate were just part of my life.
I knew my parents had an active sex life. They never hid that. If a door was closed, I didn’t open it. I remember coming home from college for the first time and hearing a door close firmly in the morning. And my mom in the bedroom with my father saying, “She’s home. Would you please put on some clothes?”
Also, the word had little meaning in my childhood. My parents were much more open than not and nothing was really considered taboo.
Except…I guess things were. Taboo in my life was saying something nasty about someone because of gender or race or sexual orientation or income or…whatever. Anything that was judgmental was stopped and discussed. Respect for people was paramount. My parents dropped friends and distanced themselves from family who could not be respectful of others.
So, I guess people being hateful is taboo to me. I’m not a naive person but I do try to be a hopeful one. I try to be the one who pushes people to be kinder. I try to be the one who picks someone up rather than pushing them down. I aspire to be better than I was yesterday, failing at times and falling on my face at others, but I don’t want to give in to hopelessness.
Now, I’m sure that I could come up with a few sexy taboos, but I think those are pretty few and far between for me. Anything has to be with consent. We don’t try to make people in our daily lives feel uncomfortable with things said that are private.
And, I still tie taboo to that perfume with all of the overtones of a child knowing that my parents loved each other enough to make themselves a priority. Always.
However, I will never smell it because knowing my luck, I will hate it and the fantasy will be tarnished.