Motivation, Chastity and Life

I have said it before – I love the ways that all of this thing we do can be done. Flavors of a theme, different “levels” or activities, different approaches. All of it so finely tuned to what works for you and your partners, it’s pretty cool that there is this assumption that “well, yeah. There’s this thing, but you have to figure out the details for you in what you like.

Take the good ol’ chastity cage, for example. There’s everything from “rivet that sucker in place” to “we use it for play time” and none is better than any other. It’s what works for you.

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Sit back, relax, show me

This is going to be a little bit of a different approach,” she says, sitting me down in the chair. She kneels on the floor in front of me, then spins slightly to grab a glass of wine off the table and turn back toward me.

I smile, then frown exaggeratedly when I realize the wine is for her, not me. “Silly. This is for me. I’m going to enjoy this.” She sips the wine again, then looks at me. Without breaking the look, she tells me what’s up, finally.

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Edge For Me

It’s just a normal Sunday night. We’ve done our workouts, had some dinner, watched some TV and now it is bath time. As usual, you start the water, put in the bath bomb, get my water and phone and Kindle and strip naked to wait for me.

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From comment: “What makes you so special?”

We’ve not received the volume of negative comments that others do, for that, I’m not at all unhappy. But we did receive one the other day that actually had me thinking.

In essence, (paraphrased) “What makes you so special? FLR and D/s and these things all of you write about don’t make you better than (me) and I’m sick of reading about it. People without this aren’t less happy, less sexy, less (fill in the blank)… Stop dictating how people should live!”

In essence, SHUT UP ABOUT IT.

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Snake’s Perspective: Lifestyle D/sFLR

This is a second part to Charmer’s post, here.

I don’t get as many questions about things as Charmer does – but I do get a lot of assumptions. I get assumptions about what it means to be in an FLR with D/s structure and how it all works for us. It’s odd how people will see a video, read a story someplace and assume that that’s both reality and the same for everyone.

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Elabor8: “Tell me more…”

Playtime is a great thing. Playtime can be a torturous time too though. Charmer tends to lean hard on the torture side of things – sometimes physical, sometimes mental. This is a perfect example of one of those times.

She likes to step all over my inability to talk about anything sexual, to answer direct, specific questions about something that’s going on. Of course, once she finds one of those soft spots, she pokes and pokes and pokes at it, just because she can.

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Change, and Chasing “More”

D/s and kink and all of this thing we do is a challenging beast. I’ve written before about some of the challenges of changing up your relationships (like FLR and D/s in general) and what it means to at least our dynamic – from learning how things are to be done, to figuring out how to communicate better.

But one of the things that constantly tugs at all of this is this feeling that “well, if that was fun, imagine what it would be like if we did twice as much!”

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