F is for Fresh Start

Maybe because I was a fall baby, it always seems like the time of the year that is time for a fresh start.

Or maybe it is when a new school year started and the new shiny pencils and notebooks were there waiting to be used. I was the nerd who loved learning so I always wanted the new classes and new books to read. I still do.

It’s also the time of the year that I want to start cleaning out. Yes, I have the thought in January too about getting my act together with clutter and getting the things all done, but it feels less daunting in the fall.

It is more like a gentle nudge instead of the RESOLUTION that I never really make anyway. The weather starts cooling down a bit here, we may see the end of our triple digits for the year this week, and we can do outside activities again.

This year I haven’t had the urge as much as other years. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised because nothing has really been the same this year. The yearly Disney trip that is always near my birthday has been postponed indefinitely. We will be heading to Portland near that time, but the trip will be mostly hotel room and family. We won’t be getting to our favorite wineries and restaurants, which makes the trip a bit odd.

Relationships that I have put a lot of years into aren’t thriving. Some are ending and others just seem to be drifting away. Some of it is just world circumstances. Others feel more like being discarded. It’s both hurtful and annoying to feel like a replaceable item. And, people change. I get that. It’s just sad to lose a connection that meant a lot.

I also know how lucky I am to have Snake as my person. He makes the awkward adjustments better. He makes me laugh and drives me nuts at times–squawking like a chicken in the car on Saturday, for instance. He refocuses me on the good when I need it. And he’s sexy–that never hurts.

He also has a new acquisition which is a new start. He (we) bought a motorcycle after years of talking about it. Right now he is just taking it to work. I have sat on it–even before we bought it. I have even sat on it in the garage with the engine running. The next step will be finding a helmet that does not make me have a panic attack.

Never even considered this issue. We talked about making sure there were armrests so I felt secure. We talked about Bluetooth. We talked about my inexperience and that it might take me some time to feel comfortable. But, I wanted it for him and for us.

So, after he bought his helmet, I tried it on at home. I’ve only felt like that once before–a maritime museum where you could step up into an old dive helmet. I couldn’t even stay long enough for a photo. Let’s just say that I will need some time to find one for myself that is safe and I can actually wear. I’m sure I will–but, I also am sure that it will take some time at home wearing it in short bursts before I can do it for a ride.

Fresh start–a new adventure for the Snake Den. And each day, a fresh start working on looking at the good stuff and minimizing the bad.