Someday, Will We Flaunt?

Someday I hope we don’t have to be as careful about all of this stuff we’re collectively interested in. It’s weird, if you stay in our relatively small comfort zone bubble where we interact with others with the same acceptance, their own interests, etc. – it all becomes ok.

But step outside that bubble and you quickly see how tv, online and even some of your friends talk about some of the things you’re into when their guard is down. You hear a lot of “can you believe…” and slanted discussions “omigawd they have a sex dungeon!” and exclamations about how anyone could do that.

Of course then they go home and play.

I’ve been in situations where it would be great to just come right out and talk with people about whatever kink is top of mind in the moment. Just talk. Not force it on them. Not out of context. I’ve had people make straight up wrong comments about something they see on TV or whatever and I have to pause, long and hard, to figure out if they’re really that ignorant about reality, and also whether I can jump in and help them understand or correct what they thought they saw.

What’s more, if you do jump in, you’re likely to get the ol’ side-eye on “oh yeah? And how do you know this?

I can honestly say I’ve had exactly 1. *1* conversation in person with someone else (another couple) about anything to do with cages. 1. Online, sure. But in-person, nope.

I’m not saying we should flaunt it. I’ve long held that Thumper’s mandate that it’s not our place to impose our kinks or likes on others. But it would sure be nice to hear what they’ve learned, what they enjoy (heck, I wanna try that!) or be able to talk about the same with us, in the right situation, without feeling like the judgement will be swift and cutting.

Flaunt is a strong word – like strutting around. I can’t really see myself generically strutting around and talking chastity or PA piercings or bondage or impact stuff. But at the same time, if the mystique and critique of all of this would chill out, I think we could all learn a lot more from a lot of different people. Just think of the experiences we could learn from. 🙂

10 thoughts on “Someday, Will We Flaunt?

  1. Great post and topic. This is something which Daddy and i have discussed at length. We jointly decided very early on that we will not hide who and what we are. There are times when it’s very obvious without our trying that we are DD/lg. i usually get the HOT AF look from the guys and the women are sickened and make their husband/boyfriend switch places so they’re not staring at me. lol Daddy has walked me on a leash along the neighborhood trails and we’re more than ok with that. i call Him Daddy all of the time. Few instances where i make any attempt to call Him otherwise. His family knows, my friends know (as i don’t have contact with my family). He bought me a locking leather collar for our anniversary in a few weeks. Aside from the rare occasion, it’s to be worn at all times… especially when we’re out.

    What i found being open about our relationship is that people are more kinky than you’d think!!! Those who aren’t at least accepting of it tend to be people who are on the fringe of our lives anyway and don’t stay in our lives…. by our choice. i don’t feel that we flaunt our kinks, but we don’t make any real attempt to hide them or be uber discreet either. It’s freeing!!!

    • That’s amazing and so cool what you’ve created! It’s funny that different sexes may see it differently, too. Hadn’t considered that!

      • Oh, indeed!!! I think what’s different between the sexes has much more to do with the age play component than anything else. Daddy is only 5 years older than me, but looks older than His years and i look younger than mine. i think it adds to it.

        Wearing an obvious collar out makes quite the statement. There are those who can’t look away and the knowing nods and those who are disgusted and work at not looking. i’ve had the rare young person stare in curiosity before moving along having formed whatever opinion. The fun is when people look at it and me like it’s perfectly normal. 😉

  2. “But step outside that bubble and you quickly see how tv, online and even some of your friends talk about some of the things you’re into when their guard is down.”

    This is going to sound very sound but I don’t think even online I have ever let my guard down. I will share a little bit of things sometimes but never felt okay enough to just talk about anything and everything type.

    Great post.

  3. I know the feeling. I remember when we went to a kink event one weekend and I happened to see a coworker from my full time job. I didn’t know how to react, what to say, but we went about our business as usual at work. Before he left the company he asked me at work if I was going to one of the other events that year. Kind of surprised he would do that.

  4. I totally agree that it should be possible to talk about anything to anyone (in the right context of course) without them being shocked at what you tell but rather for them to be interested and to learn something. It’s not like we want them to go do the same because we have talked about it, but why can people talk about their ‘normal’ sexy life, and we are ‘not allowed’ to talk about our kinky ones. It would be so much easier to just be able to respectfully talk about things without judgment.

    Rebel xox

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