I love reading the TMI Tuesday questions and last week was one that I wrote to Snake about in our personal journal. The question was: Love is made of many components. What are your top three components of love?
Three was really hard to narrow it down to. Because it meant figuring out components of each component down to the atomic level and I tend to overthink. Just a wee bit. But, this is what I came up with after my initial cheat of you, you and you to Snake.
Chemistry: I think without that initial spark, love doesn’t stand a chance. As we’ve mentioned before, Snake and I met in high school. Land of hormones and sparks everywhere. But, yes, there was obviously an initial spark. Have you looked at him? I mean, he got my attention from the beginning. And he tells everyone that he “knew” when we first met.
Chemistry is still there. Not always burning hot and bright like the sun. But, then, maybe it is. Pretty constant with a few solar flares here and there to keep things exciting.
Friendship: We became friends first. We were both dating other people at the time and built a really solid friendship. We knew each other for about six months before we moved it into the dating realm. And, let’s face it, for high school, that is an eternity.
It has helped during the most wonderful times. It has helped during the shittiest of the shitty times. We built our relationship during the hardest part of life–college–which I akin to building a house while an earthquake is erupting. We broke up for a while, but, even then, the friendship was there.
It got us through the vulture capitalist who tried to ruin our lives when we were newlyweds. It made deaths of parents and other family ups and downs not easy but something to handle together.
He’s still my best friend. We like doing things together. Travel. Eating out. Movies. Dancing. Binge-watching series. Giggling about silly things. Disney. We can enjoy being together and it is just fun.
Communication: This is crucial. Without it, we couldn’t do this thing that we do. We wouldn’t be able to explore other people or even live our dynamic. This ability to talk to each other and listen and compromise and adapt, I think, has been why we are able to grow together and not apart.
Truthfully, if you asked either of us, I know that our favorite thing is talking. We seem to be able to find a restaurant or bar, get some wine or drinks, and sit for hours just talking. It really is quite disgusting that we are still in love and still have things to talk about for that long, isn’t it?
So, where does the good bones come in? He mentioned last night at dinner that when we do something around the house, it always seems like it will be so much work or catastrophic. And, yes, sometimes it feels that way but we get it done and then it looks so much better. Snake said that he felt like that was the definition of good bones.
And you know? I think our relationship has good bones too.